Actually Yesterday was Five. . . Today is Four

 ~ Highlight of the Day: Looking through Jerusalem pictures. . . best. time-sink. ever. ~

The number of mission stories I hear has increased dramatically in the past half a year or so, couldn't tell ya why, and I thoroughly enjoy it.

 

And I don't want anyone to feel left out, and I don't have any of my own yet, so I'm going to share this lovely story I happened across on a friend's mission blog today:

 

{it's a little long, but believe me, you'll like it}

 

Wednesday: We get home from splits and go on splits again right after with the UCLA sisters. So, I stay in my area and am with Sister Son (a sister from Korea, who also was Sister Atkinson's baby). [meaning Sister A trained Sister Son]
Anyway, I knew the split was going great when within the first hour, she said to me, "Sister Jones, I can't take anything you say seriously."

"What? Why?" I respond.

"You talk like a black person." #obviously,thatisthebestcomplimentIhaveeverreceived
Anyway, we had way too many adventures to write down, but at the end of the night, we went and had a lesson with Earnest at the library.

*okay, Mom--don't freak out at this story, okay?*

[this is what Sister Jones says to HER mom!]

So, we have a lesson. Super spiritual. Whatever. #well,notwhatever,but...whatever

Earnest leaves first, and we follow out behind him (we're about 30 seconds behind).

As we're leaving the library, we see Earnest on the side of the road, talking frantically on his phone, and there is a man DOWN on the ground!
So, naturally, Sister Son and I pull over, jump out of the car, and go see what is the matter. We run up and see that Earnest is on the phone with the police trying to tell them where we're at and there is a man, covered from head to toe in blood. He is just laying there, with his phone in his hand.
OH MY GOSH. Was he stabbed? Shot? Is he going to die?!
So, my pure Korean companion just starts praying out loud, right there and then.
Earnest is freaking on the phone, Sister Son is praying, and then all of a sudden, bloody man starts talking!

"Where am I?"

"Oh my gosh, you're at the Downey Public Library. What is your name?!" I frantically ask (#youknowhowIdoinpanicsituations...)

"I can't remember."

"Yes you can," I say.

Then, he starts passing in and out of consciousness. So, I'm kneeling on the ground, next to this bloody man, and E$ and Sister Son are in their own little worlds.

"WHAT IS YOUR NAME?!"

"Charlie," he mutters out.

"Charlie, what's your last name?! What's your last name?!"

"Kinnap." And then bloody man passes out.
Then he's back.

"Call my wife," he pleads.
So, I grab his bloody phone from his bloody hand and get blood ALL over me (#gag #mymissionstorytotallybeatsyourmissionstory) and ask, "What's your wife's name, Charlie?"

He starts to tell me, but he can't because he starts COUGHING UP BLOOD. What is going on?!

"Charlie! Stay with me! What's your wife's name?!"

"Priscilla," he says and then he's out.
So, I take his bloody phone to my ear (he has the cutest picture of his baby as his screen saver) and call Priscilla. I call once. Nothing. I call twice. Nothing.

PRISCILLA! YOUR HUSBAND IS DYING!

At this point, Earnest has gone to Charlie. Charlie starts saying, "I"m going to die. Tell my wife I love her." Earnest responds, "You're not going to die. You're going to be fine. You say with me. You a Christian?"

"Yes," says Charlie.

"The Mormon missionaries are here. Everything's going to be fine, alright?" says Earnest. #Ilovethisman

"Pray for me," says Charlie.
So, Earnest is just holding this bloody, dying man and is praying for him.

I am trying to get a hold of ANYONE! Priscilla doesn't pick up so I go through his recent calls and see someone named Chuck with the same last name.

"Call President Weidman right now!" I yell at Sister Son #sheisNOThandlingthissituationverywell
So, she runs off and starts calling.

I call Chuck.
Chuck picks up!

"Hello?" he says.

"Chuck! My name is Sister Jones. I am a missionary and I'm here with Charlie. He's down and bleeding. How do you know Charlie?!"

So nonchalant, he says, "He's a friend." OKAY, can you show a little concern here Chuck?!
All of a sudden, three people from Embassy Suites (the hotel across the street) run up. "We found him!" they say on their radio.

One of the security guys walks up to me and says, "Who are you calling?!"

"Chuck!" I respond (Chuck is still on the line).

"Who is Chuck," he asks.

"I don't know," I say.

"Hang up," he orders.

"Hang up on Chuck?!"

"Hang up."

"But...it's Chuck!"

"Hang up!"

"Sorry Chuck, I gotta go," I say into the phone.

*hang up*
I would totally hate me if I was Chuck.
Anyway, the three hotel people leave (I have no idea where they went) and then it's just the four of us again: Earnest, me, Sister Son, and bloody man Charlie.

The police call Earnest again and ask, "Is this the man from Embassy Suites?"

"I don't know," he says.

"Then ask!"

"Are you from Embassy Suites?!" Earnest asks the dying Charlie.

He just grunts.

"Are you from Embassy Suites?!"

"Yeah," Charlie responds.

"Alright, we'll have people there as soon as we can."

Then, Sister Son (who is FREAKING OUT #butwithgoodreason) hands me the phone. I have no idea who is on the other line.

"Hello?!"

"Sister Jones, this is Elder Davidson (our A.P.). What's going on?!"

"Um...there is a bloody man and he's dying and the police aren't coming..." at which point Earnest interrupts and says, "Sister Jones! Call 911 again! They're not getting here fast enough. We're going to lose Charlie!"
So, then I say, "...and I have to go. I'm so sorry, I'll call you when I can!"
Once again. I would hate me if I was Elder Davidson.

So, then I call 911.

"Hello, this is 911 Emergency Services. What's the situation?"

I bark back, "The situation is that there is a bloody man down on the corner of Brookshire and Firestone. He is losing blood fast and he is in and out of consciousness. You need to get her FAST!"

"Is he the man from Embassy Suites?"

I check with Earnest, and get an affirmative.

"Yes!"

"Personal are on their way. Please calm down ma'am." #DONOTTELLMETOCALMDOWN

So, we're waiting and FINALLY start hearing the sirens.

Then, the hotel people come back and they start talking to Earnest. Sister Son is who knows where (#yayexchanges) and then Charlie gets this sudden burst of energy and tries to stand up.
Yeah...that didn't go so well.
He stands up and then just collapses right on his face! He is just on the ground in the most awful position (okay?! Can the police get here already?!).

"Charlie," I plead, "STAY DOWN!"

"I see a light, Sister."

"CHARLIE! STAY AWAY FROM THE LIGHT! Don't you dare go toward that light! Help is coming, okay?!"

Then, they arrive. But, they are just taking their sweet ole time. Then, Charlie freaks out and tries to get up again and get away (#whoisthisguy?!)
So, this bloody man starts stumbling (he looks like a zombie) toward Sister Son. She literally starts screaming.

"Sister Son! Come over by me!"

*scream, scream, and more screams*

She was a little paralyzed by her fear.

"Sister SON! GET OVER HERE!"

I go over and get her out of the way.

And then Charlie just goes down!

The police and paramedics run around him. As they approach him they yell, "Does he have a gun?"

DOES CHARLIE HAVE A GUN?! OH MY GOSH, WE'RE GONNA DIE!

Then, Charlie loses is and starts going OFF on all of these officers. "'F' this" and "'F' that." Honestly, I couldn't have been more thrilled because I thought homeboy was going to die 10 minutes earlier.
They get him down and then start asking us all these questions.

"Did you see him jump out of the window of Embassy Suites?"

"HE JUMPED OUT OF THE WINDOW OF EMBASSY SUITES?!"

"Or did you see him jumping from balcony to balcony?"

"HE WAS JUMPING FROM BALCONY TO BALCONY?!"

Needless to say, they were a little frustrated with our lack of information.
They asked what happen. Earnest explained: "I was driving and stopped at the stop sign. I look to my right, see this man all covered in blood standing up. Then, Charlie looked at me, and said, 'Help.' And then he just collapsed to the floor."

"What were you doing here?" they interrogated.

I tried to explain to them that we were trying to teach Earnest about Jesus, but they were NOT believing me. #offended

Finally, a police officer comes up and says, "They really were," and then looks at me and says, "I'm LDS." #thankyouHeavenlyFather
So, after all of the questioning, I guess here's what happened:

Our friend Charlie suffers from PTSD. He had an episode and freaked out on his wife and baby. So, he broke a window, realized he was in trouble, and tried to hop from balcony to balcony. He only got about a block in a half before he collapsed due to blood loss (introduce Earnest).
So, mostly, God loves Charlie because had we not have found him, he would have died.
NUTS.
So, they finally tell us we can go home (it's about 9:35pm or so). We get in the car and respond to the millions of missed calls from the A.P.s. We respond, tell them we're all right.
But, fun fact is that we weren't alright. Sister Son legitimately went into shock. We get into the car. OBVIOUSLY, I'm like, "OH MY GOSH CAN YOU BELIEVE WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!" and she just looks at me and then BURSTS into tears. Like uncontrollable sobs and she can't control herself and she's having a hard time breathing.
We're driving home and I have NO idea what to do.

"Do you need ice cream? (#yes--thiswasthefirstthingIasked #probablybecausethat'swahtIneeded) Do you need to lie down?"

She's not responding, but just sobbing, sobbing, sobbing. Homegirl is hysterical. Finally she chokes out, "I need help Sister Jones!"

So, I call our Zone Leader and say, "Elder--we need a blessing. NOW."
They drive straight to our home and give her a blessing. And, Sister Son, who was completely hysterical, was just at peace.
Holy moly is the Priesthood power of God real.

Then, it was nearly 11pm and we went to bed. I talked to President and had to make a bunch of more calls (poor Sister Son).

Anyway, it was nuts. And I realized that the Preisthood power is the most amazing blessing. Earnest was in the army and knows his stuff, but honestly, he couldn't have done anything for Charlie. But, on the other hand, this little 19-year-old kid could have called him back from the dead.
Thank you Heavenly Father.
NUTS.
So, the next morning, we switch back and I barf this story to my companion. #sheisSOmadshemisseditbytheway

I love my life."

 

So there you have it. In just FOUR days I will be on my way, and who

knows what wonderful stories will come of it!

 

And for all your patience, here's a picture:

 

 

Random, I know, but I was looking through family photos, compiling some to print and take with me, when I stumbled across this gem and just couldn't not share it with the world.

 

Arizona may be hot, but not hot enough in December to make a dip in the pool comfortable. . . :)

 

 

Four

~ Highlight of the Day: reading all about what awaits me in Paraguay, written as only Neil can :) ~

( Grosella, something I may be trying at some point in the next 18 months :)

 



Accomplishments of Yesterday:

 

1. Successfully played a version of Tetris involving boxes, luggage,

a bike, a guitar, a shofar, and my car :)

 

2. Acquired two tickets (not the fun kind) in two different states. . .

 

3. Survived solely off of baby carrots, hot dogs,

and nutty bars for 10 hours

 

4. Navigated my way from Provo to Gilbert without one

of those silly smart phones or GPS thingies :)

yay for maps!

(and step by step directions :)

 

 

~ And now for the best part of this post ~

 

 Flashback: Beginning of Winter Semester, 2013

 

Marina: We should make a music video.

Me: Oooo I have the perfect song! Anything for You by Ludo!  

Marina: (doubtingly) I've never heard of it. . .

 

Fast forward 8 months. . .

 

and we have a masterpiece

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ze Vant My Blood

~ Highlight of the Day: A whole package of chocolate pudding (made better with a spoonful of cocoa powder) all to myself, just 'cause I can :) ~

 

 

This happened forever ago.

 But I planned on blogging about it, so gosh darnit I'm going to blog about it!

 

 

I'll begin by saying I don't like donating blood. It's just not natural to think, 'yes, I would love to part with a pint or so of what keeps me alive!'

 

At the same time, I understand the importance of it. So occasionally I do :)

 

I donated in Israel, and I was feeling pretty good about my contribution to society,

but the lovely ward recruiter guilted me into signing up ('guilted' as in asked me nicely with a nearly empty sign-up sheet). I was sure though, that I'd be ineligible.

 

So the day arrived,

and I make the guy look up Israel and Jordan and Turkey.

 

And then I make him look up Yellow Fever, and Flu, and Typhoid, and Pneumonia immunizations.

And you know what, I was good to go.

Until he asked for my ID. I didn't bring that. Oops.

 

But apparently they accept temporary ID's from the ID place in the Wilk, so after going through the whole process again we got to donated after all! 

 

Very excititng, I know.

The whole ordeal was totally worth this legit picture :)

 

And I probably won't be doing it for another 18 months

 (you know, the whole mission thing :)

So it's a good thing I got to!

 

Good Ol' Czech Food

~Highlight of the Day: Chicken and Rice for dinner. . . Mmmm :) ~

 

Peach Kenedleky. . . Cendedlicky. . . Cinedlacky. . . Knedliky!  

Yup. Knedliky. it's Czech for 'dumpling', and it's the best dinner ever.

 And this is how you make it:

 

Edible Weeds aka E.W.

~ Highlight of the Day: watching Troll Hunter ~

 

 

Purslane

Portulaca oleracea 

 

 

 

Working for the Pesticide crew at BYU has resulted in a few side effects.

 

First, I dream about killing weeds. Really. I do.

 

Second, I am now hyper-aware of said weeds (perhaps an explanation for the dreams). Dandelions never really bothered me. . . until I hunted them down in the lawns of BYU for 8 hours a day, several days in a row. After that you can't help but notice them in places you never have before. . . like on hikes and in people's yards, and on the back of your eyelids when you close your eyes.

 

Third, weed I.D. has become a fascinating subject that I love to read about during my lunch break. That's not too weird, is it? :)

 

Anyway, weeds have become an important part of my life, and in the last day or so an important part of my diet as well.

 

I truly have a salad bar sitting outside my door, thanks to the beautifully watered and unweeded flowerbeds that grace the mangled lawn of my apartment building.

 

 

 So this is the normal flower bed, with a normal amount of weeds

 

and. . .

 

 

This is the other flower bed. 

You can't even see some of those flowers anymore.

Like I said, a regular salad bar :)

 

 

Also, I splurged and watched Monster University in theaters, and do you know what I saw? Weeds! In the grass! Their turf is in terrible condition. . .

 

 

Stay tuned for more Edible Weeds :)

Para-cord Survivor Bracelets

~ Highlight of the Day: Saving Virginia's mint plant - the cute little (hungry) caterpillar

 has been relocated :) ~

 

I spent the weekend in Arizona, and learned how to make those survivor bracelets that are all the rage with all the prepared people. And since I know you are all super prepared people, I thought I'd share my new found knowledge :)

 

 

 You will need:

3 arm-lengths of polypropylene rope (para-cord)

(Or if you want more exact numbers, around 10ft for men and 8ft for women)

1 small buckle

1 lighter, or other source of flame

1 pair scissors

 

 

You probably don't want rope more than an 8th of an inch in diameter

or it will get pretty bulky, and if you get thinner stuff you may need more of  it.  

And the more pounds it can take the more useful it is - it may someday be supporting your weight as you dangle precariously off a cliff, you never know :)

1. To begin, cut your appropriate length of rope and find the middle of it. Pick up your cute little buckle and make sure the ends are curve-up, like a smiley face.

2. feed the middle of the rope through one end of the buckle. Make sure you are heading from the bottom to the top of the curve, or for the math-minded, from the convex side to the concave side.

 

 3. Then pull the cut ends of the rope through the loop and pull it tight. This secures the middle point of the rope to one end of your buckle.

 

 4. Feed the cut ends through the other side of the buckle, from the convex side to the concave (this picture has the buckle flipped upside down to what it previously was. . . it's ok, you can still do it!)

5. Measure the size of your bracelet on your wrist. It will get tighter as we tie it, so leave some space for that. I suggest one or two fingers width, but it depends entirely on how tight you want it to be.

6. Hold onto that length and don't let it slip! We are going to unbuckle the bracelet and start tying.

7. Start by folding the ends down, so the buckle is pointing straight up and all four strands of rope are headed down. Then take the left cord and cross it over the two cords in the back. This will form a backwards 'P'.

 

8. Take the right cord, pass it over the tail end of the left cord forming the 'P', and then back behind the two back cords.

9. Still using the right cord, push it up through the loop of the 'P'.

10. Go ahead and pull the rest of the cord through, and pull it tight. This first knot will be a little skewed, because it's the first. So if you think it looks a little lop-sided, you're doing fine.

11. Now if you've noticed, what used to be the right cord is now shooting off to the left, and what used to be the left cord is now going off to the right. This is important. The cord we initially made the loop of the 'P' with will always make the loop of the 'P'. So we're going to go back and forth between making backwards 'P's and frontwards ones. The first one we made was backwards, so this one should be exactly the same thing, just reversed.

Here's the steps one more time, reversed for the second knot.

 

12. Now it's just a matter of tying the knots consistently so they look even. The picture above is what two knots look like, the picture below is three knots.

13. Keep it up till you get to the other side of the buckle. If you want a lot of rope on there, try to keep the knots tight and close by adjusting them as you go.

 Just keep tying till you can't possibly fit another knot.

Here's the whole bracelet, buckled back together, with the extras still uncut.

At this point try it on. If it's too small or too loose it's not too late - simply work backwards, undo all the knots (this is good practice for that emergency situation anyway), make your length adjustment, and tie it again.

 

The tying goes pretty quick once you've got it down, so adjusting it before cutting the ends off it completely worth it if you want a good fit.   

14. After it's the perfect length you just cut off the extra, take that lighter we mentioned at the very beginning, and melt the ends to seal them.

A few things to be mindful of on this step:

 

 make sure you melt it enough to stop all unraveling. A raveled rope will be of no use to you on that cliff, and it's not too stylish either.

 

After melting the ends, let it cool for a second or two and then flatten it out with the flat edge of the scissors or another object you don't mind getting melted para-cord on. This will keep it from slipping through and coming undone before the emergency situation.

 

And last but not least, when you're flattening the melted ends, be careful not to meld them to the other strands of the bracelet. Unless, of course, this bracelet is purely for looks, and not to someday save your life. If that's the case then go for it - seal it all off completely and melt it all together so it'll never come undone.

 

If you want it to be functional, make sure you can work it through in a panic :)

 

 

And that's it!

Congratulations. You have a super cool, super useful para-cord survivor bracelet.

 

 

 

College Gardening At It's Finest

~ Highlight of the Day: FHE* at the Duck Pond :) ~

 

MY PERSIMMONS SPROUTED!!!

 

Remember that one post in December. . .

well, I am proud to introduce to you a brand new baby persimmon seedling:

 

 

Not quite sure what I'm going to do with a persimmon

 seedling while I'm gone for 18 months, but I'm sure I'll figure something out :)

 

And basil seedlings!

AND one of my irises is going to bloom!

Guys, you don't know how exciting this is. I thought I had totally killed these irises (after all, I bought them half way through last summer at an iris show in Pennsylvania, stuck them in the basement, flew them to Washington, packed them in a box to be moved to Arizona, and forgot to find them when I went home for Christmas. . . ) but apparently I didn't! 

 

This could be one of five cultivars. . .

'Red Skies'

 'May Debut'

'Kentucky Derby'

'Again and Again'

and 'Indian Chief'

 

I have no idea which one.

The suspense is killing me.

 

I love loving plants :)

 

*FHE stands for Family Home Evening, and its something most LDS families hold on Monday evenings. It usually consists of a spiritual thought/lesson, an activity, and a treat. Here at college we are organized into groups to hold FHE on our own (since we're not in family units). My calling in my ward is FHE leader :) gotta love it.